so it’s true, the end is also the beginning

mood: adventurous
Category: Life

A line can be straight, or a street, but the human heart, oh, no, it's curved like a road through mountains.
Tennesse Williams


My heart and life has been ALL curves thru the mountain...family, marriage, kids, jobs, friends, divorce.... nothing straight or even slightly predictable...Sadly, I think I always knew he did not love ME, the real me. So, I chose to see that an end is also a beginning.

One year later...Today is my birthday. I will consider this a true, curved beginning. The end was curved and treacherous. The beginning is not. It is full of hope and optimism. My human heart dares to take that curved journey again....Do I dare to be alone? Hell yes. Lonely? I was for so many married years...what's new? Friends, loves, so much stays vital and real over time...Beauty, as in the eye of the beholder, flying thru the air, like that plastic bag, spinning over the road in the film "American Beauty", that's what remains...

Today I clearly see that curved road running thru my heart...it spills on out to the rest of my life. It is well- lighted and beckons. From this day on, I am free from certain ghosts, wise to others...unafraid (who knew?) even of more failures. Shit happens. for sure...

I swear, I will pick myself up and try to live by nothing more than this: to be as good as I can be, to cause the least amount of pain or harm to this world and its'inhabitants as possible, to love my friends, family and daughters with all my heart...

I promise to judge the drunken spelling bee with sass and humor...to uphold the scripps national spelling bee standards to the last sip of wine, to write poetry even if it is bad poetry, to write incredible short stories and to one day really ,truly write a great american novel. Really. I promise it to myself...and damn it, I believe i will!
On top of all of that, I will believe in goodness and music and beauty and even love again...
So, on this, the longest day of the year, my birth day, I raise a glass to new births and the suns' rotation!

Slante and godspeed to all whom I love.